View Full Version : kids
Neuromancer
04-19-2012, 11:45 PM
All night screaming projectile vomiting, nuclear diapers
the only they were made so damn cute is so you don't smother them to death.
*shoulda been Jayne but its another Adam Baldwin character.
" But sir you have 4 kids"
Well, one's pretty bad, but you figure you gotta have two so the little guy can have a brother or sister, right? Then you have two boys, and the wife says she want a girl so you figure "Hell, three can't be much worse than two", right? What you don't realize is your brain is fried 'cause you haven't slept. After three, four is no big deal. You're so deep in it, nothin' seems to matter any more. It's chaos. You're just tryin' to make it through each day alive. In the end you spend all the energy you have left tryin' to get 'em into bed only to lie awake prayin' they don't get hooked on drugs, hurt, or worse... wind up dead in an alley somewhere.
Senior Airman Simon Wells: Can't wait, sir.
Colonel Dave Dixon: Yeah, miracle of birth, my ass. I'll tell you what a miracle is, birth control that works.
Sorry if its a repeat I hit this once or twice a year and crackup everytime.
thebanik
04-20-2012, 01:39 AM
hehehehehehe.....how many you got neuro????
on my first kid and loving the experience till now. He turns 1 this 24th. Right now wife wants 2nd because the little guy should have company......:(
Witchdoctor
04-20-2012, 01:56 AM
Kids are a blessing from the gods
They are truly blessed for dumping them off on us, based on our niave sense of imotality :laughing:
MaadDaawg
04-20-2012, 04:08 AM
All night screaming projectile vomiting, nuclear diapers
the only they were made so damn cute is so you don't smother them to death.
*shoulda been Jayne but its another Adam Baldwin character.
" But sir you have 4 kids"
Well, one's pretty bad, but you figure you gotta have two so the little guy can have a brother or sister, right? Then you have two boys, and the wife says she want a girl so you figure "Hell, three can't be much worse than two", right? What you don't realize is your brain is fried 'cause you haven't slept. After three, four is no big deal. You're so deep in it, nothin' seems to matter any more. It's chaos. You're just tryin' to make it through each day alive. In the end you spend all the energy you have left tryin' to get 'em into bed only to lie awake prayin' they don't get hooked on drugs, hurt, or worse... wind up dead in an alley somewhere.
Senior Airman Simon Wells: Can't wait, sir.
Colonel Dave Dixon: Yeah, miracle of birth, my ass. I'll tell you what a miracle is, birth control that works.
Sorry if its a repeat I hit this once or twice a year and crackup everytime.
I'm thinking this was written for DOM :rofl:
Kids are a blessing only when they are yours, and primarily when they are young and cuddly. Once your kids are grown, the problems change but you still survive. And you don't dare look back and think of how much money they cost you :eek:
At this point in life I look at young parents and I think to myself ... "WTF are they thinking" ?? :rofl:
Actually, knowing Neuro, it's a line from a book or something , but hey.. might as well have fun where we can :laughing:
OC Maximus
04-20-2012, 07:00 AM
My daughter is 3 1/2 and our second one is almost a week late. Wife is sooo ready to get this pregnancy over with. Our boy should be here any day now.......
....
..........
.................
:)
kikicoco1334
04-20-2012, 09:30 AM
grtz ocm
MaadDaawg
04-20-2012, 01:55 PM
My daughter is 3 1/2 and our second one is almost a week late. Wife is sooo ready to get this pregnancy over with. Our boy should be here any day now.......
....
..........
.................
:)
Hey congrats OCM :thumbsup:
You gonna be home for the occasion or you transmitting from periscope depth :D
hehehehehehe.....how many you got neuro????
on my first kid and loving the experience till now. He turns 1 this 24th. Right now wife wants 2nd because the little guy should have company......:(my youngest is 1 tomorrow wanna come to the party haha
That how mine was the two oldest have to moments but there mostly always fighting even the baby trust to fight with them but she's still to small :laugh:
I'm thinking this was written for DOM :rofl:
Kids are a blessing only when they are yours, and primarily when they are young and cuddly. Once your kids are grown, the problems change but you still survive. And you don't dare look back and think of how much money they cost you :eek:
At this point in life I look at young parents and I think to myself ... "WTF are they thinking" ?? :rofl:
Actually, knowing Neuro, it's a line from a book or something , but hey.. might as well have fun where we can :laughing: it did kind of sound like mine :rofl
My daughter is 3 1/2 and our second one is almost a week late. Wife is sooo ready to get this pregnancy over with. Our boy should be here any day now.......
....
..........
.................
:)congratulation bro
I still want a boy :ohcrap:
Neuromancer
04-20-2012, 06:49 PM
It is a quote, from a TV show Actually :)
I have 3 kids. I just found it amusing and though I would share
And early congrats to OCM !!!
two is a good number . . two hands two kids
three becomes tough in a store when they all run off in different directions...
OC Maximus
04-20-2012, 07:08 PM
Thank you Men. ;)
MaadDaawg
04-21-2012, 03:35 AM
I had two girls, and DOM my brother, I pity you ... you poor soon to be broken shell of a man :shock:
If you stop now it will be 4 females against YOU once they reach puberty. Your house will be saturated with estrogen, and they will gang up to make you miserable, never realizing they are doing it. Females are pack animals, and they know individual males are easy prey... especially when the male can't run away :rofl:
I would stop making babies now if I were you Bro. The child's sex is determined by the fathers contribution, and you, like me, seem to be shooting females bullets while your male grenade launcher either remains empty or broken. Go for 6 or 10 kids and you may get lucky, but odds are ... you'll be horribly outnumbered in 10 years or so.. The more girls, the more they'll beat up on you. The only upside is, they will love you to death while they psychologically beat you to a pulp :D
Then just pray none of them get pregnant in their early teens :eek:
So have a wonderful weekend DOM, but run out and buy some condoms first :rofl:
Bones
04-21-2012, 03:46 AM
I had two girls, and DOM my brother, I pity you ... you poor soon to be broken shell of a man :shock:
If you stop now it will be 4 females against YOU once they reach puberty. Your house will be saturated with estrogen, and they will gang up to make you miserable, never realizing they are doing it. Females are pack animals, and they know individual males are easy prey... especially when the male can't run away :rofl:
I would stop making babies now if I were you Bro. The child's sex is determined by the fathers contribution, and you, like me, seem to be shooting females bullets while your male grenade launcher either remains empty or broken. Go for 6 or 10 kids and you may get lucky, but odds are ... you'll be horribly outnumbered in 10 years or so.. The more girls, the more they'll beat up on you. The only upside is, the will love you death while they psychologically beat you to a pulp :D
Then just pray none of the get pregnant in their early teens :eek:
So have a wonderful weekend DOM, but run out and buy some condoms first :rofl:
Hey, can't disagree with this.
Although I don't have any kids of my own, I've helped to raise my fair share of them via babysitting for other family members.
Guess I got lucky and learned the 'Easy" way what it's like....:blush:
:rofl
I still might give it one more shot :laughing:
I already told the wife what's going to happen to them if they disappoint me like that... But I know I'm going to be screwed when there going to want all different cloths and shoes...
But it sucks having girls cuz you know how boys are :ohcrap:
MaadDaawg
04-21-2012, 08:47 AM
Hey Bro.. it ain't just the cloths and all... :laughing:
Groups of women tend to menstrate at the same time, proven fact. You're gonna have 4 of em raging at you several days out of every month :eek: hitting you from every direction at once :ohcrap:
I'm tellin ya, 3 was the most I could handle, and you're gonna risk 5 :shock::shock::shock::shock::shock:
GL :D
That's why I'm going to have to make my own lil house out back or move out when that happens :laughing:
And I'm not scared just of getting stressed and getting gray hairs :rofl
I'm the youngest of 6 so I like to have a big family ;)
Just don't know where I'm going to put them all :laugh:
MaadDaawg
04-21-2012, 11:07 AM
Once you move into the garage there should be plenty of room in the house :laughing:
Kal-EL
04-21-2012, 04:15 PM
BULL'S HAVE BOYS OCM!!! :D
pc-3tKM5EC0
MaadDaawg
04-22-2012, 04:01 AM
except for the lack of explatives, that Jeans commercial is pretty close. I remember spending the night in a delivery room before my first daughter was born, and it sounded just like what I'd imagine the holding pens of the Spanish Inquisition sounded like :P
PhIlLy ChEeSe
04-22-2012, 05:58 AM
That's why I'm going to have to make my own lil house out back or move out when that happens :laughing:
And I'm not scared just of getting stressed and getting gray hairs :rofl
I'm the youngest of 6 so I like to have a big family ;)
Just don't know where I'm going to put them all :laugh:
I'm the youngest of seven (only male), They do tend to get bitchy at the same time! :blink: Hell I'm 48 I aint started having kids, not after the 75 niece's and nephew's. That make's me a Great Great Great Uncle! I feel older just saying that! :eek:
Kal-EL
04-22-2012, 06:30 AM
Woman of the same household or male in common tend to have syncronous menstration cycles. So if you have 3 girlfriends as a young man, they will eventually syncronize their menstration cycles, so I've heard......... :P
MaadDaawg
04-22-2012, 08:24 AM
Woman of the same household or male in common tend to have syncronous menstration cycles. So if you have 3 girlfriends as a young man, they will eventually syncronize their menstration cycles, so I've heard......... :P
Scary ain't it :eek:
PhIlLy ChEeSe
04-22-2012, 03:20 PM
Scary ain't it :eek:
So I'm cycling? :ohcrap:
Kal-EL
04-23-2012, 06:40 AM
:green2: yes?
PhIlLy ChEeSe
04-23-2012, 09:06 AM
I only had to deal with two of them growing up, the oldest is twenty years my senior.
kikicoco1334
04-24-2012, 03:29 PM
holy crap something just hit me....
some of y'all's kids are my age or older....
MaadDaawg
04-24-2012, 03:52 PM
I still want a boy :ohcrap:
GO FOR IT BRO :D
:club:
kikicoco1334
04-24-2012, 04:03 PM
congratulation bro
I still want a boy :ohcrap:
stop trying! we know you gonna end up with another girl, you know you gonna end up with another girl! :taunt:
MaadDaawg
04-24-2012, 04:11 PM
stop trying! we know you gonna end up with another girl, you know you gonna end up with another girl! :taunt:
odds are against ya DOM.. but :wtfsign:, you're screwed already wot you got to lose :laughing:
odds are against ya DOM.. but :wtfsign:, you're screwed already wot you got to lose :laughing:
That's what I was thinking im screwed regardless :laugh:
MaadDaawg
04-25-2012, 03:47 AM
yeah, what's just one more menstrating female ... the 4 you'll already have in a few years will rip you to shreds anyway :laughing:
Buy a big male dog - make sure he LOVES you... he'll protect you, ummm ... somewhat :rofl:
kikicoco1334
04-25-2012, 08:09 PM
you know what! it'll be really fun watching you suffer hehehe